FUCK IT ALL

honestly speaking i am fucking sick and tired of everything that happens to occur in my life... i have become a couch potato... a fat ass bitch who has nothing but fats left in her brain and body... maybe its true after all that i am a fat creature... assignments just pile up but i fucking don't know what to do... i am afraid of the world and i have got to buckle up if i want to reach the expectations of my fucking group members... like what the fuck... i don't give a fuck but i actually do... it's just so hard to manage this earth... today morning i threw a plastic bag into the dustbin all because i was lazy to keep it... i was just being a self-centered selfish bitch not giving a fuck about the other 6 billion people on this earth... yugesh asked me to stop swearing and do i look like i give a fuck... seriously yugesh i can't just stop... if there were no swear words the problems that occur in my life would only seem worse... i am financially broke... i have no discipline to just cope with the pace of the world... my mom and dad are so fucking annoying but they are the best things in my life like honestly... sometimes i feel like home and most of the time i feel fucked... i am so fucking fat i can't wake up in the mornings to catch that bitch ass bus to college.... i want a fucking car to fuck to college... atleast i would be able to wake up at 7 like that instead of 6.... like serious shit what the fuck... i have been skipping classes like shit like how i am now blogging with may's lappy between luke and her in accounts class and i don't get a fuck the woman is blabbering in front... the only classes that make me feel happy and motivated is english and econs tutorial... we always underestimated ms jamie but come on man... she is the bomb... sometimes its just so hard for me okay... omg i don't even know if i am gonna have kids... life sucks that much right now.... i was having a blast last night at may's surprise but now i am just broken.... was it the fact that i slept sleeping on the north.... i always wake up when i sleep facing the evil north but sometimes it feels so darn good... god this fucking sucks over and over again.... i have to lose my weight... i just find it so hard to not eat.... i'm a fucking glutton... i am a fucking pimple face... i'm a fucking loser... everyone has so much of expectations of me.... they just assume that i can always put on a show for them and just keep smiling my ass off... dicky actually said he loved 3.2 cause its nice to see me smile... sze mun told me to be myself today cause i was putting on an emo face.... catherine of all people just stoppped with a hi and did not say more when she saw my face this morning... is life really that bad.... i don't think so.... my friends have been a blast and coming to think that i am gonna suffer another three years with some fucked degree... it makes me wanna puke... oh luke.... hahahaha... but i believe my friends would eventually save the day for me... however now i am in the mood to murder someone... and i want to be so mean... as mean as my fats that i want to piss my friends off and make them cry... this saddistic thought is haunting me and i am so gonna fuck someone today... just anyone who gets in the way.... the problem with me is i hold grudges... but i can never emo... jezreel always said that i can never emo well... and seriously i don't get why ms alina said of all people i must never be sad... yo what the fuck... this world is coming to an end... my exams coming in the end and all my truancy is going to back fire someday... this is terrible blogging... if ms alina were to mark my blog she would be like what the fuck you have no structure at all... okay now i am just trying to break some world record of longest emo blog ever... sick sick sick.... fuck fuck fuck.... i really don't understand... i keep challenging god.... like litereally... i was like if you get me to your temple by morning i will be vegetarian the whole day... if you don't i won't be vegetarian... and then i got a stomach pain last night and i was like what the fuck god... deal i will be vegetarian the whole day even if i don't come and see you... but i really wanted to see him but my mom keeps getting sick and saying no... she's old la okay its that part and parcel of life thing.... that fucking old age shit... why god.... eh what the fuck did i do to you now... and so i pack shit loads of bread and milo to college cause i am fucking vegetarian... how am i gonna cope with food for the next two weeks... i am going to cope but what the fuck... if i don't see you today god i am gonna fuck you real good... see what sort of shit i'm crapping... i really wanna to come up with some super remedy to solve this fucking shit.... no food.... starve.... bleed to death.... horror... bitch ass... fuck...

MY HOPE, MY GOD